Life

Why we should keep in touch with old friends

Since I was invited to attend a golf/ dinner on 22nd Aug 2015 at KGNS KL for graduates of the KL Technical College, which is now known as UTM, I have taken the liberty to write this article for my old friends. Some of them I have not seen since my graduation in 1957. I am now 82 years old.

Life wouldn’t be nearly as interesting, exciting or emotional without friends. Friends are there to teach us about how other people work – they are our window to the world outside ourselves and our family life.

They introduce us to the diversity of human nature as well as teach us how difficult it can be to get along.

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Friends serve a very important role in our development as individuals. They also function as a support team when life gets a bit overwhelming – which, at one point or another, it always does. As we grow older, we create new friendships and allow older ones to die out.

Here are some good reasons why we should reconnect with our roots and reach out to those who once were a fundamental part of our lives:

  1. At the very least, you’ll experience a hint of nostalgia – everybody loves nostalgia. Meeting up with old friends brings an air of youth along with it. It brings memories rushing to the forefront of our minds, allowing us to bask in the warmth.

Nostalgia is a beautiful feeling. It reminds us of the way things once were, the happiness that we experienced growing up, and all the wonder. If you have no other reason to contact any of your old friends, then do it for the sake of the smile it’ll bring to your face.

  1. It’s fascinating to see how our roads diverge over time, taking those that were once close to us to opposite sides of the world.

Each of us writes his or her own story and although many stories have similar beginnings, the middle and the end will differ greatly. As humans, we often only rely on our own perspectives, paying attention to the way our own stories play out.

Reconnecting with past friends will allow you to see the world in a new light. It will show you how funny and weird life can really be. You were a part of their lives at one point and they a part of yours.

Maybe you influenced each other more than you know.

  1. They’ll remind you of the person you once were and will allow you to better judge the person you have become.

Life seems to become more complicated and more difficult with age. Life’s daunting questions weigh heavier upon us year after year. With all that goes on, it’s easy to lose sight of ourselves.

To lose sight of the dreams we once had and the people we hoped to one day become. Life may not have been simpler back then, but to us it was.

We had a simpler way of thinking – more black and white, with much fewer greys. Getting in touch with your old friends will remind you of the person you used to be. Maybe you lost track. Maybe you’ve grown wiser. Either way, it’s good to know.

  1. It may convince you that you knew how to find real friends better when you were younger than you do now.

Friends, generally speaking, aren’t easy to make – especially when you get older. The older we get, the more independent we become. Frankly, the older we get, the less we need friends. Or, rather, the less we believe that we need friends.

As adults, most of the people in our lives are mere acquaintances. However, we don’t always recognize them as such. We sometimes get lost in the illusion that the acquaintances in our lives are actual friends.

While most people become better judges of character with age, they also get lonelier and more desperate with age. You may have awful friends right now and not even know it.

  1. On the other hand, you may realize that your judgment has improved significantly with time.

You may meet your old friends and decide that you were crazy thinking that these people should have stayed in your life. You may even remember why you cut them off in the first place.

A reminder of what friends shouldn’t be is just as good as a reminder of what friends ought to be.

  1. It’s not unthinkable that you may reconnect and continue the friendship.

I feel that all the excitement of growing up, of going to high school, then college, then finding a job, makes us lose a lot of valuable connections. We lose touch with a lot of people due to geographical reasons.

We also lose touch with many friends because we get overly excited about making new ones. Maybe it’s time to rekindle the friendship.

  1. Friends are a fundamental part of our lives – there should be a reason for either letting them go or keeping them around.

We shouldn’t simply leave things to chance and allow them to either dwindle or carry on simply because. But that’s what often happens. Friendship breakups don’t have the pizazz that relationship breakups do; they usually fade away as if they were never there to begin with.

This says nothing more about us other than the fact that we are egocentric and lazy creatures. You could have made an effort to stay friends, but you didn’t.

That’s not a very good reason not to keep a good person in your life. Good people are hard to come by.

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